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Thursday, February 22, 2007

Trading for (some) anonymity and publicity

At the risk of starting this blog on an arrogant foot, I have been blogging way before it was cool. However, I always wrote about myself and my experiences non-anonymously. Back in the mid nintey's when I was a pre-teen, this wasn't really such a big deal because there weren't vey many bad things that could happen to me if I wrote about my personal life. Besides, most of the adults in my life didn't even know what the Internet was. The worst they would probably do is send me off into a corner to think about what'd I'd said so publicly.

As I grew older, however, things changed drastically. I realized that there were certain things I couldn't write about publicly without fierce reprisal and backlash, and it became physically and financially dangerous to pen these writings under my own name. What a shame, I remember feeling, because how awesome an experience I am deprived by such societal restrictions. Needless to say, as I became more sexually aware and experienced, and eventually began exploring BDSM activities during my teen, I knew I would have to keep my writings behind "closed doors."

For a long time, that's what I did. My non-anonymity was more important to me than sharing my feelings, thoughts, and experiences with a larger group of people whom, I hope, may be able to instigate new and perhaps even sometimes unsettling insights for me through conversation and interaction. Now, however, I'm rethinking that model and this weblog is an attempt to find a compromise between my desires and the reality I find myself in. (Isn't that always the struggle?)

So with that thought, I will start sharing my writings here in the hopes that I can join the larger BDSM blogosphere in their fascinating and stimulating discussions. Thus, a brief introduction, regardless of the fact that it may undermine my total veneer of anonymity.

I am a white male of average height and a slight build. I became involved with the public BDSM, fetish, leather, gay and poly communities several years ago, and today I am 22 years old and am in a long-term relationship with my dominant girlfriend. Everyone I know calls me "maymay."

While I'm sure this has already been enough for some people to identify me, I just can't write a thing about this topic with anything other than an authentic and personal viewpoint. For everyone else, you'll learn a lot more about me when (and if) I continue to write more.

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